I open my eyes an d jal is standing in front of me all I hear is a howl adolf hitler. jal smacks me in the face '' I decleare death to all English men starting with the death of your chicken'' NO NOT MY CHICKEN NO''.The hang my chicken by a rope upside down and let it swings back and forth until jal put a rock in a sling. The rock hit it in the head. I ran and push jal he landed on a flag and it went up his bum. Jal say" Hang him up !!" and dose the same thing to me .
I hang there.....
great story your puncuation was emaculent but mabe trying to add more detail
ReplyDeleteA short and descriptive piece Blake. Your goal si to use more punctuation - get the simple stuff right. Mrs W
ReplyDeleteA short and descriptive piece Blake. Your goal si to use more punctuation - get the simple stuff right. Mrs W
ReplyDeleteI really like how you have used precise language and you have informed me but I think you could use more punctuation.
ReplyDeletegood language next step could be more detailed and longer
ReplyDelete