Wednesday, 14 October 2015

piss kobe

"Hay mate,;wake up,wake up, you english b*s*ed piss kobe. get up, boy put a pillow sheet over his head''.

I open my eyes an d jal is standing in front of me all I hear is a howl adolf hitler. jal smacks me in the face  '' I decleare  death to all English men starting with the death of your chicken'' NO NOT MY CHICKEN NO''.The hang my chicken by a rope upside down and let it swings back and forth until jal put a rock in a sling. The rock hit it in the head. I ran and push jal he landed on a flag and it went up his bum. Jal say" Hang him up !!" and dose the same thing to me .

I hang there.....

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5 comments:

  1. Anonymous21 October 2015 at 16:45

    great story your puncuation was emaculent but mabe trying to add more detail

    ReplyDelete
  2. Mrs W25 October 2015 at 15:23

    A short and descriptive piece Blake. Your goal si to use more punctuation - get the simple stuff right. Mrs W

    ReplyDelete
  3. Mrs W25 October 2015 at 15:23

    A short and descriptive piece Blake. Your goal si to use more punctuation - get the simple stuff right. Mrs W

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous27 October 2015 at 14:21

    I really like how you have used precise language and you have informed me but I think you could use more punctuation.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous28 October 2015 at 16:46

    good language next step could be more detailed and longer

    ReplyDelete

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